May
13
Louis 100 word challenge Captured
The deafening screams echoed around the cold night. Searing pain tore through my ears. Pangs of anxiousness suddenly turned into dense fog. The moon masked by the inky clouds, no light to be seen. Once again, blood-curdling shrieks shattered the silence. Frantically searching, the colossal silhouettes of trees blocked my view. Fingers numb, the bitterness scraped across my cheeks. The entwined, gnarled twigs and aged leaves obstructed my path; stuck…
Scarred and hopeless, I could do nothing. A scent of evilness crept up to me. Snapping twigs and crunching footsteps filled my ears. Where was I being taken?
I screamed…
I love that we don’t know he’s been taken until the very end! By then you have painted such a vivid picture of a chilling scene that the revelation is especially shocking.
Take another look at this sentence, “The moon masked by the inky clouds, no light to be seen.” Is there a word missing perhaps?
Really creepy writing. You have really worked hard on getting the right language and it’s paid off! A small point but I wondered if ‘crept up to me’ would be ‘crept up on me’?
Good work, Louis.